When Lu Jinnian replied, Qiao Anhao could see a murderous glint in his eyes.
She knew that he wasn't being honest, and she also knew that the lie was to humor her, but if he wasn't willing to tell her the truth, she would never force it out, regardless of how curious she was.
It was definitely an extremely painful and torturous thing.
Any woman that was treated in such a fickle way by the man she loved would feel a sense of despair and uneasiness. Qiao Anhao was well aware that he didn't love her, but when their relations.h.i.+p had slightly gotten better, she couldn't help sinking deeper and deeper. But on the day of his birthday, she had woken up completely and had been reminding herself since not to be deceived anymore.
But what does it mean to really love someone?
Was it knowing that even though he didn't love you, that he could hurt you, you still couldn't help worrying and showing concern when he was down?
That was because you would hope that he was happy, and because you would be affected when he was sad.
Qiao Anhao knew that she didn't have a backbone. She should have stopped loving him on the day of his birthday, when he had treated her that way, but she couldn't. She had been loving him for thirteen years, loved him for his strength and his flaws. One could say that she was silly or maybe even dumb, but by that moment, she had ignored him for far too many days. Right then, all she was left with was care and concern.
In a small voice, she said, "Don't be sad, no matter what it is, it'll be over with in time. Remember never to hurt yourself, even if you're angry."
Sometimes, the person you love would have a mysterious power over you, a simple sentence would be enough to melt you completely.
Qiao Anhao's words were like a pot of honey, wrapping Lu Jinnian in warmth and sweetness, grat.i.tude and love, spreading straight to his heart.
He turned his head to look at her and saw that her hand was wrapped in a bandage. When his eyes rose to her face, he seemed to be in deep thought and wanted to say something but nothing came out. In the end, he reached his hand out to pull her into his arms.
He hugged her tightly, his eyes starting to sting, his heart warm and full.
In a low voice, he said. "I'm sorry I hurt you."
Qiao Anhao's heart melted. If it had been a second ago, she would still have been thinking of the bad things that he had done to her, but right now, she no longer cared. She lifted her arm and circled his waist, then a.s.sured him, "It's all right."
Lu Jinnian rubbed his chin on the tip of her head. After a while, he spoke again. "I'm sorry."
Qiao Anhao thought that he was still apologizing for the injury on her arm, hence she said again, "It's all right." She paused for a bit before adding forcefully, "It's all right, besides, it's a small injury."
Lu Jinnian remained silent, but he tightened his embrace.
His second apology was not because of the injury, it was because of their child.
He was sorry that he had implicated her, causing the death of their child.
He was sorry that he wasn't a good father and wasn't able to protect the child properly.